MPM - Friday, May 15

Looking back on your life, identify 5 major stepping stones in your relationship with money. What did you learn, or what did you come to believe, or what changed at these times?

Describe these stepping stones in your journal, and then, as briefly as possible, summarize them in your response to us. Keep it as close to 50 words as you can.

My dad stole the money he needed. Therefore he lost the love of my mom and kids and later he lost his life. He created a lot of problems and I started hating him for all this mess. Even today there are feelings of anger and sadness coming up in me. 

I had to earn my pocket money by cleaning our appartment. If you want money you have to deliver something to receive it and sometimes this could be something I dont like.

I found out that sex is possible if I would have enough money to buy it.

We had very little money when I was a child. I felt somehow excluded from other pupils. One of my dreams was that I had more money that I would need to fullfill all my wishes.

MPM May 12, Questions

What area of your money life is most challenging for you?  Being dependent on the monthly cash/check, and not being able to say no and just quit the job if I want to. I must go to work due to the need of the money, there is no choice in that at least in my conditioned mind.  Spending more than I earn. The amount of money someone earns or possess has for me something to do with how important and powerful this person is. The more a person seems to possess the more respect / admiration / fear I have. This person could destroy my life or take my women or ... Dont save enough money for retirement, makes me anxious about the future  There is a fear of losing my job / money and then having nothing left  In my family success was always connected to having / earning / possessing a lot of money. So Im not successful in my eyes if my monthly pay isnt enough and if I spent more than I earn. Easy program to attack myself subconciously, where one of my beliefs is that I would only be loved by my mother if Im successful / rich / have enough.  Is there a facet of it that causes suffering? Not having enough makes me feel sometimes worthless and not belonging to the group / class I would love to belong to.  Im becoming jealous when my mother is telling stories about others and their success / money. In what area of your relationship with money would you most like to have a breakthrough during this class? I would like to let go the attachement to money and all the beliefs I have in connection to money.